Introduction
A couple of years ago we began a journey with our youngest son that resulted in him having a diagnosis of ADHD. With both my wife and I having worked in healthcare we struggled with this diagnosis in a few ways. Firstly, we felt that it can pigeon-hole people into categories that shape how other people view them. Behaviours can be seen as problematic, challenging, and even the actions of a ‘bad’ child. We first see the problem often times before we see the person. Yet, secondly, it also challenged us to think of our hearts, and how we would learn and grow, and indeed be taught by our child as to how they could flourish in the home, school, and particularly in church.
Yet, the most surprising thing we learned was that he wasn’t likely alone with his ‘super-powers’ - indeed the apple might not have fallen too far from the tree/s. Now, we have wrestled with this a lot because we believe that our society can be quick to diagnose and determine. We haven’t sought diagnosis, partly because we are not sure how this would help at our stage in life, but what we have learned has meant for a better understanding of ourselves and a few ‘ah-ha!’ moments for our marriage and how we relate to one another - which has been invaluable. We might share about this in future, but as we have shared some of our journey in this, we have bumped into quite a few people in ministry, particularly the ministry of church planting that are wired similarly.
Church planting is an exciting and rewarding ministry that requires individuals to be organized, focused, and adept at multitasking - all traits that are heightened somewhat in people who display behaviours aligned with ADHD. However, for adults with traits found in Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), the challenges of managing time, attention, and impulsivity can make this endeavour even more demanding. In this blog post, we will explore the intersection of certain traits of adult ADHD and church planting ministry, shedding light on the unique struggles faced by individuals with ADHD. Moreover, we will provide practical coping mechanisms to help those in this ministry context thrive and effectively serve their congregations. What we want to state at the beginning is that we are not trained to diagnose or determine if you have adult ADHD. If you want to walk towards diagnosis, please speak to a certified medical professional. What we want to do is to share some of the traits that are observed in this to draw attention to them, and also to be able to have language to maybe communicate in relationships, particularly in marriage, friendships and church to understand one another better.
Understanding Traits Of Adult ADHD in Church Planting Ministry
Adult ADHD is a neuro-developmental disorder characterised by persistent difficulties in attention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. While every individual's experience with ADHD is unique, there are traits that appear common across the spectrum of people. However, one of the elements that we want to discuss is that the traits that are outlined are often deemed negative rather than positive or, as we’ve said, ‘super-powers.’ ADHD is seen as a tag line for energetic and disorganised, yet people can demonstrate hyper-awareness, attention to detail, heightened empathy, and a natural ability to problem solve. Of course, there is impulsivity and chaos at times, but many people who display these traits have subconsciously developed coping mechanisms to make them highly effective in life, particularly in ministry, that they come across as driven, efficient, ministry machines!
Of course church planting ministry can present particular challenges for those with these traits. The demands of juggling multiple tasks, maintaining a structured schedule, and focusing on long-term goals can be overwhelming. A hyper-focus on tasks can tune people out. A sense of time blindness, believing that Google Maps estimations of travel time are wrong and a challenge to beat often leave us constantly late for meetings. Losing things, having an organised clutter, and never meeting a 5 minute space that you can’t squeeze a 15 minute task into can be frustrating! Moreover, the unpredictable nature of church planting ministry, with its ever-changing demands, can intensify the difficulties faced by individuals with traits of ADHD. The pressures to start new ministries, develop relationships, and handle administrative responsibilities can be a recipe for stress and burnout. So how can we start a conversation on how we can manage and flourish if we are displaying these traits?
“Coping” Mechanisms for Success
Firstly, and most importantly, remember that you are an image bearer of God! When we talk about “coping” mechanisms, our minds run to the notion that we are a problem that needs to be fixed. But let me tell you, if people need a complex job done in 15 minutes they will need you! If a church weekend requires intensive research, detailed planning, and 15000 options, then in steps “super-powered ADHD trait person!” You are both valuable and beloved by God - and often misunderstood by others. These suggestions might enable us to ‘cope’ with people, as they ‘cope’ with us - developing a relationship that helps us and them flourish, and understand our struggles. Feeling hectic and overwhelmed isn’t fun. Feeling disorganised and constantly feeling the shame of being late isn’t fun. Overthinking every conversation, comment, or ‘look’ to the extent that we believe that everybody hates us is not fun! However, if we can better understand ourselves and in turn are better known by others it will lead to an honesty and vulnerability that is a beautiful display of the Gospel. If you are reading this and you don’t think this describes you, or you are the spouse of someone who displays some of these behaviours, don’t try to use these to ‘fix’ people. This isn’t bingo, shouting “ADHD house!” when you get a line of 3. It’s to start a conversation to help one another, especially in marriage and ministry.
Establish Structure: Creating a structured routine can help individuals with traits of ADHD better manage their time and responsibilities. Set aside specific times for planning, study, and reflection. Utilise organisational tools such as calendars, planners, and reminder apps to stay on top of deadlines and commitments. I have found apps like Todoist helpful, giving access to my wife to add to it. If I’m told to remember something I will often forget it - yet, I will remember what an ancient theologian said word-for-word in a treatise in 674! I understand that this is frustrating to people - so a little checklist helps me remember. I’ve also realised that I can only work in very closed environments because I’m so easily distracted, but both a structured plan and environment helps greatly with this.
Break Tasks into Smaller Steps: Large projects can be overwhelming for individuals with traits of ADHD. Breaking them down into smaller, manageable tasks makes them more achievable - and gives little dopamine hits every time a small victory is achieved. Prioritise tasks, and focus on completing one step at a time, rewarding yourself after each milestone. Yet, there are times where I can go into a robotic mode of ‘hyper-focus’ getting an insane amount of work done in a short space of time. When in a period of ‘hyper-focus’ we can be tremendously effective and efficient, other times we can struggle to stop looking out the window at two birds fighting and, before you know it, three hours have passed! Little victories add up to big ones, and large goals can feel so unachievable that there appears no point in starting. Yet, don’t be afraid to ride a wave of ‘hyper-focus' if manageable and reasonable for family and commitments. In a previous job people knew if I was working on data entry with my headphones on then I could be left for hours of incredibly productive work, but one little interruption threw me completely.
Delegate and Collaborate: Church planting ministry involves teamwork and collaboration. This can be a challenge, because in times of hyper-activity and task-achievement, we might feel that other people slow us down. However, this is not good - and long term, spinning 17 plates takes its toll, and once 2-3 fall, they all might come tumbling down. We need to recognise our strengths and weaknesses, and delegate tasks that are better suited for others. This is ever true within church planting ministry - because we can be generalists. So as we are surrounded by people (by God’s providential grace!) let’s join together in His work to see His glory and fame spread. Furthermore, partner with team members who can offer support and accountability, helping you stay on track and manage your workload more effectively. Be honest also - there is no greater phrase that reduces fear, shame and anxiety than “me too!” and develops relationships in the most wonderful ways. Partly because we can be wholeheartedly focused on a task and then days later completely mentally discard it, we need to be aware of people who are only onboard when we start to move on. It’s like watching a tornado zoom in and out! If we are honest about our ability to start things, open to team work and collaboration, then we can see fruitfulness beyond what we could expect on our own.
Embrace Technology: Take advantage of technology tools that can assist in managing ADHD symptoms and traits. Use productivity apps, task managers, and time-tracking tools to enhance focus, set reminders, and improve time management. Share calendars with people that help us not take on too many tasks, and add margin into your schedule. Margins are around pages because if the words went all the way to the end it would look confusing and muddled. If we have a 30 minute meeting, block out 45 minutes in case it runs on, or we are late. Even space to process after will be really helpful in the long run! I am constantly on the lookout for new apps, interesting podcasts, helpful shortcuts to provide assistance in life. One of the traits that can occur is a hyper-curiosity, so don’t be alarmed if I ask you for all the apps on your phone, programs for sermon prep, or church management software - just know you are really helping me out!
Practice Self-Care: Self-care is essential for anyone in ministry, but it holds particular significance for individuals with traits of ADHD. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, sufficient sleep, and relaxation techniques can help reduce stress, improve focus, and increase overall well-being. There is a definite jolt and crash, particularly within relationships. We can be running at 100mph and then just collapse - staring off into the distance, present, but not really there. Over time, relationships can be draining, not because we want them to be, but because our energies are running low, and our focus all over the place. As well as this, we can become so paranoid and fearful, running over every possible outcome in our heads that we can avoid people all together. It’s not that we have checked out, we just need some space. Try to have some people who can recognise the hyper-active and collapse stages, and who are comfortable with both. Also be aware that meeting new people can go either way, either chatting at 100mph or completely silent, so try to pause and reflect at stages, or ask someone you know to try to regulate you a bit!
Conclusion
Church planting ministry requires individuals to navigate a range of challenges and responsibilities. For adults with traits of ADHD, these demands can be especially overwhelming. However, by implementing practical coping mechanisms, we can effectively manage our traits and symptoms and thrive in this ministry context. Remember, establishing structure, breaking tasks into smaller steps, collaborating with others, utilising technology, and practicing self-care are some elements in managing traits of ADHD effectively. By thinking through even some of these strategies, we can find balance, enhance our productivity, and make a significant impact in their church planting ministry. So, embrace your unique strengths and ‘super-powers’, seek support when needed, and don't let traits of ADHD hinder your journey in church planting. With the right coping mechanisms and a supportive community, you can flourish in your calling and bring transformation to the lives of those you serve.
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